About the Sunshine

Sometimes I feel dark, and sometimes I feel very light. Lately I have been feeling unneeded, unwanted and unimportant.

I really don’t like those feelings.

I feel like I’m wasting my breath, time and energy whenever I speak.

I feel like I am annoying my family and my friends.

I feel like anything I say isn’t important, and that it is irrelevant to anything going on.

I’m so sick of this feeling.

I feel like I’m the annoying friend everyone pretends to like, but no one really does.

I broke down and cried today. RewindHost helped me get my old blogs from 6birds.net back, but trouble arose when I tried to restore the backup to old.6birds.net, so Harrison is helping me with that. I tried to import them via phpMyAdmin about 4 times, but I kept getting the same error, even though I was following the tutorial on Codex.

I think the dark theme was what continued to keep me feeling as if I was living in a thunderstorm. When I feel down in the dumps, I keep going downhill, and it’s so hard to get back up again. I’m going to end up hating these themes I’m using once I get done with this bottle of Feeling Down – no matter how much I grow to like them whilst i use them.

That’s why I’m not going to use the theme Aashni made me yet.

Speaking of which, I need to go to the store. Brookshire’s will do, especially since it’s the closest one that has what I need[1. Like a $30 Top-Up card for my Virgin Mobile USA cell phone].

I just feel like my life is so boring.

P.S. I moved all of my visitor content to a subdomain.

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Comments on this post

[…] side effects also apparently include depression, which would explain the reasoning behind why I can’t seem to bring myself up and out of this never ending pit I seem to have fallen […]

Hey, Liz…

Yes, its better to get a reliable host for the future, it is like an investment, rather spend a little more rather than having problems with the cheaper host in the future.. 🙂

@Jerminix, I do have a reliable host already. RewindHost was my old host, from last year. I had wanted to start over on 6birds, but now I regret the fact that I don’t have my old entries, and it sucks. That’s what I was talking about.

I’m really happy with my current host, and it isn’t a cheap host.

But that wasn’t the point of my entry.

Hm… I think around last month. 😀 Well, I checked my e-mail to be more accurate and I think it was registered on the 25th last month. OMG today’s the 25th. HAPPY ONE MONTHAVERSARY TO THIS DOMAIN! 😀 That means a month full of thank you-s to you! 😉 & I could see why you’d be nervous. Some people get a handful domains, and don’t use them. && No problem, but I should be thanking you! Thank you! 😀

Haha, I think everyone has cheesy-ness every now and then. cheesy voice xD To flap the wings of the cheesyness, and ride the updrafts of words, haha! & Yay! I’m glad that you’re feeling better! && Everyone has these bitter moments from time to time, but it doesn’t mean you yourself as a whole are bitter. 🙂 “bittersweet”, I guess.

I had one of those days yesterday. Work wasn’t too bad but after I got home and sat down, I got to feeling really, really depressed. Like.. why do I exist? I just cause problems for everyone else, etc. I tried to listen to music to help but, it only made things worse.. then it eventually got better. Worse part is, my husband (who is really amazing to me) was here too. Blah.

Don’t feel that way. It’s okay, really. Your family loves you. I’m 23 years old, dropped out of college twice, I work a full-time job for crappy pay, and I’m stuck in an apartment. As my husband says, just have to think of things that are good, things that make you happy. On my list were peanut butter and sleep..hah, but it helped.

@Kristi, I haven’t been listened to at all lately, though, and so it’s really “UGH”. 🙁

Peanut Butter makes me break out. 🙁 Then again, all nuts do. I’m pretty sure I have a nut allergy! Haha. 😛

Haha the pink camera in my hands is not mine. It’s my friend’s. The Canon EOS 1000D is mine 🙂
And I think the pink one was a Sony.. So you do not have the same one!
X

@helena, Sorry, I guess I misunderstood. Dx

Awh, whatever the further details, I hope & know that this whole situation gets better! You get to heal as time passes. & I definitely know you’re not that annoying friend ( not that I’ve been stalking you, xD ). Trust me, I’ve had a handful of those, and the only reasons your friends wouldn’t like you is that if you hit them, cuss them out, make fun of them, etc. Since you’re in a bad situation, they’ll understand that everyone has their ups and downs through time, since not everyone’s life is perfect, and it would be terrible if they didn’t like you because of whatever. ^^ You could talk to them about it, maybe. On the other hand, if you were doing annoying-ish stuff (not that you would), just remember, “There’s no such thing as a villain in most storylines, but people with different intentions.” xD If that helps. In short, YOU’RE A NICE PERSON! 😀 No matter how long it takes, you’ll be back up there. (sorry if this comment was full of cheese btw xD) Oh – AND, it’s ~NOT too late to apologiiiiiizeeee! It’s NOT too laaaaaaaateee!~ c:

-x-

Haha, like you, I don’t let my friends cut my hair. I’m only making an exception this time xD. She’s older than me, and is in college, so I trust her, hehe. & I’ve seen lot’s of people going around pretending summer is all carefree and like, “~lalalala nothing to do at all gonna sleep at 3am and wake up at 2am xDDD~”, but there’s work to do! :3 Or else I’m fired! Firrreddd! FIIIIREEED! c: But “foh” seriously, I think it’s more busy this year. & Thank youuu! xD And I hope so, haha!

Hey, Liz…

I think that everyone feels like that sometime. You just gotta tell yourself again and again that it’s not true every time those thoughts come up, because it’s not true at all! As you’ve discovered, it’s a dark world down there…

hugs

@Stephanie, I try, but it gets to be too hard sometimes. 🙁 I really don’t like it. :/ BLah.

hugs back Thanks, and I hope you’re doing alright. :3