I don’t hate being single.

That doesn’t mean I like/love it, either, though.

There are always problems with the guys I get into relationships with significant other-wise:

  • they try to have with me what I have with another person
  • they are still in constant contact with their ex
  • they are still in love with their ex
  • they see no problem with communicating with their ex
  • they see no problem with going to their ex’s house (whom they still love, their ex still loves them, etc.), especially after I say, “Yes”, after they ask
  • my list gets longer than this

We’ll start with “they try to have with me what I have with another person”.

Andy was really sweet – I’m sure he still is. We talk occasionally, but not so much. It’s really funny (in a non-funny way) how quickly two people can go from talking to someone almost all of the time to hardly talking to them at all. And even if you both agree to stay friends afterward, there’s always one person who isn’t mature enough to allow that to happen, no matter the circumstance[1. Although somehow this does work for some people.].

However, whilst in the truck (my dad’s truck because Andy couldn’t drive and neither could I; but Andy was older than me! WTH) my dad and I were talking. “Our thing” is going back and forth and trying to have the last word. My evil[2. Just a harmless inside joke we have with each other. You wouldn’t believe how many people think we’re actually serious about it.] stepmother Kim only got to join in on it because hey, she’s in the family and married to my dad and that’s just kind of… I don’t know. She “passed the test” years ago. Sure, that sounds legitimate. BUT Andy joined in. Andy. joined. in. Andy joined in on me and my dad’s THING.

Sorry, but that’s a huge turn off for me. We were together for about four or five months. Then we dated a second time sort of, but I broke up with him again (after promising not to). I felt really bad for it, and I can’t even remember why I did it. However, he just seemed like more of a friend… I didn’t mean to break his heart. 🙁 There were also a few other things, but no need to embarrass him. One (not sure if this can be considered “embarrassing” or not) would be his clinginess and the need to be in contact with me (talking-wise or touching-wise) constantly really got on my nerves.

Unfortunately he’s one of the only guys who have ever seemed to have had feeling for me for me and not what I looked like. I went to his band banquet in this really revealing red dress that I unfortunately don’t have a picture of on this laptop (on my old one /: ; yet another thing to get off of it whenever I get enough patience to deal with it) that seemed to for some reason make him even more interested in me looks-wise (because in school I didn’t exactly wear tight clothes like everyone else).

That’s one relationship I do miss, though. I actually wouldn’t mind having it again. I look back at it now and just think, “I could have told him taking me and my dad’s “thing” bothered me. A few of the other things actually weren’t so bad,” because this next relationship I’m discussing is Chris[3. Not my brother of the same name. ;)].

Why wait?

That took more words than I expected…

See ya next time 😉

also: not sure what to tag this; “significant other”, “SO”, “dating”… I want it to be more specific than “relationships” and a tag I can use in the future without having to result to something else, especially since I consider “dating” to be more like just that (dating) and not exactly a “relationship”, like a boyfriend, but I don’t want a “boyfriend” tag. Also don’t know if I should tag this as Andy… Because I don’t know what the future holds…

-.- I put too much thought into that up there ^. That’s what I mean by the over-analyzing everything thing.

…and category “Life” or category “General”? Shutting up now.

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Comments on this post

[…] « I don’t hate being single. […]

Someday, I think that you’ll have a relationship that works out well, and hopefully without too many of the above problems. I don’t understand why people would be in constant contact with their ex while they’re dating other people… logically that just seems a bit inappropriate. And speaking as a girl who has been accused of being very much like a guy

1) Committing is hard. In my relationship, I am the one that is holding off on committing. Maybe it’s because my boyfriend’s a few years older than me, and he’s approaching the age at which people marry and I’m not there yet. I think that guys can be faithful and true and great boyfriends even if they haven’t committed to the idea of staying with you forever. As long as you enjoy each other (and nobody’s in a rush to get married) and behave like reasonable people (cheating is not reasonable…) then a formal commitment shouldn’t matter.

2) I’d also forgive Andy for being interested in you physically after seeing you in the dress. He just didn’t realize how sexy you were. 😛 Maybe it was a little off-putting, but it doesn’t mean that he loves you, for you, any less.

I personally enjoy my relationship very much, and I wish you the same enjoyment soon! Unless you’re a really good liar on the Internet, you are an awesome person. Sooner or later, someone will realize it and be awesome to you. 😀

@Stephanie,

1) I’ll admit that I’m a bit afraid of commitment. Although it would be nice, I’m not ready for that yet. Plus people in my family would ask about kids and whatnot. Whenever the time comes, however, Mimi would be all upset whereas people on my dad’s side of the family would be very excited for me and wonder when I’m going to have a kid or two. P:

2) Oh, I figured. 😀 I was neither mad nor upset, and I felt rather great that the next day at lunch when another friend (can’t remember her name at all, but it’s such an easy name!) asked, “So what did your dress look like, Sarah?” and he replied with, “It was sexy,” and his cheeks were really red. xD He was a really shy guy, and I haven’t seen him since high school so I don’t know if he still is or not.

I’m not a good liar online/offline at all. P: I’m as honest as possible. & Thank you. <3

I would add to that list,
-they don’t want to commit.

They guy I’m interested in will always have communication with his ex, because hey have a child together. Although he can’t see his kid like he wants to become of the circumstances of where he lives. I don’t hate it nor love it. It has it perks, then again, it has its down falls.

@Darianne, YES. I HAVE THAT COMMITTING PROBLEM WITH GUYS, TOO. And it’s extremely annoying. 🙁 Ugh.

I’ve tried dating guys who have kids. Like in high school, a guy I dated (it was one of those “fling” things slash rebounds slash “a convenience”) had a kid, and his ex was still in love with him and pretty manipulative. They’d always go and hang out, and he ditched me to hang out with her. 🙁 However, he didn’t care about the kid; he just ended up being a player.

I really hope it goes well for you. I think the fact that he wants to see his kid more shows more responsibility than most single guys with kids have these days. I don’t know… I keep hoping the older they get the more mature the end up being, no matter the circumstance.

Well at least this one isn’t on your list:
– they end up being gay

Why would you ever promise someone that you’ll never break up with them? Seems like a pretty big thing to say… because it takes a long time before you truly know a person… he could have done some really bad stuff and you’d be stuck with him!

It was the second time we dated… And because I missed him. P: coughiwashavingsecondthoughtscough Ahem, so, anyway… I dunno… We originally broke up because of drama between me and a close friend of mine at the time, plus her boyfriend who literally ACCIDENTALLY got friend requested by one of my friends from a previous school I went to VIA my account simply because her boyfriend’s name was “Patrick”, and my other friend was trying to find one of “Patrick Alan, The Band”‘s friends, but it was their personal account (thus they only added people they knew personally). For some reason, said close friend didn’t believe me when I said that Patrick Alan, The Band was really Patrick Allan and a band, and that it was a local band. She only grew more angry at me because I knew her boyfriend’s middle name. -.- I was all, “Um… what?” So, yeah. It was this huge mess, and Andy found out from said close friend, and yeah… .-. The first time we broke up it was over stupid, ridiculous and redundant high school drama that was actually an event that was 1) accidental and 2) totally and completely innocent.

  • in middle school the guy I had this huge crush on ended up being gay -.-
    Oh, and my high school nemesis was this gay guy. P: Before I met him I thought all gay guys were really nice people. Pierce scarred me — for life. #justsayin’.